Roman Polanski, Father Marcial Maciel, and the Eye of the Beholder
. . . Since his 1977 conviction for child sexual assault, Roman Polanski has won three Academy Award nominations and a 2002 Oscar for Best Director. Meanwhile in our own backyard, Catholics are now pitted against Catholics. Bishops are bullied into shunning their priests. Cardinals are sniping at each other in public, and the mere taint of association may cost one of the highest ranking Catholic Church officials his reputation and career. There is something wrong with this picture. And there is one ominous figure who is taking it all in from his place in the shadows, having the laugh of his long, dark life. . .
Hot Town: Summer in the Slammer
. . . The summer of 1969 had other worries and trials as well. Because of a tragedy in my family - which I will write about one of these days - I had to find a full time job at sixteen. I had one that I thought was secure. It was in a machine shop, but I was laid off just as that summer began. I took the only job that I could find, and it turned out to be the worst job of my life. . . .
A TSW Summer Re-run
. . . “A Corner of the Veil” is about the death of my mother, Sophie Kavanagh MacRae, during my imprisonment. Tomorrow, July 15, is her birthday so this post in her honor is my choice for a summer re-run. I would much appreciate a prayer for her as well. . . .
Create in Me a New Heart, O Lord, and a Steadfast Spirit Renew Within Me
. . . I learned that a donor heart had been found for Christopher. As I write this he is in the middle of an eight to ten hour heart transplant surgery at Pittsburgh Children’s Hospital. The days and weeks to follow will be of critical importance for this young man. Your prayers are also of critical importance. Please pray for Christopher Warwick, for his new heart, for the heart’s donor, and for the Warwick family. . . .
These Stone Walls: Spring Cleaning and Loose Ends
. . . Are men in general like that? I sure hope not, though lots of prisoners are. Add to the mix a bit of prison paranoia and they make for a challenging population. A twenty-six year old came to my cell door last week with a worried look on his face. He had been to sick call that morning with a sore throat, nagging cough, runny nose, and headache. He seemed perplexed that he wasn't hospitalized immediately. Instead, he said, they gave him some Tylenol and cough syrup and told him to wash his hands a lot. . . I told him it sounds like he has a common cold, and washing his hands helps keep it from spreading to everyone else. He looked at me as though I was delusional, and walked away alarmed that I would share the medical staff's utter ignorance of the severity of his condition. He's still alive, but I've never seen him wash his hands. I washed mine twice while typing this post! . . .
In the Year of the Priest, the Tale of a Prisoner
. . . It's hard to describe the brokenness of the person sitting a few feet away staring intently, lost in a mindless TV show. Most of you do not have a category in which to understand the aftermath of such a shattered life. Skooter, his head shaved, his right arm covered in prison tattoos, looks as menacing as a wounded person possibly can. Skooter said I am the first person he has ever told of his past. I believe him. He wasn't able to tell most of it even to me. Instead, he spent all night writing, and gave his story to me in the morning. He titled it, "The Life of Skooter." It's not an easy story to tell. . . .
Jack Bauer Lost The Unit on Caprica
. . . I wrote that life in prison revolves around television. The prison commissary sells a small twelve-inch flat screen TV, and the profits from prisoners' weekly purchases go toward a recreation fund that pays for basic cable. So prisoner access to television costs taxpayers nothing, and is an essential link to the outside world. In fact, TV in prison actually saves a lot of money. Most prisons would have to double their staffs if not for TV. There are only four television shows that I never miss. You already know what they are if you looked closely at the title of this post. The problem is, it's summer, and they're all gone now. "24" and "LOST" have come to an end and are gone for good. I will never again get to see Jack Bauer accomplish his most mind-boggling feat - driving anywhere he wants to go in Los Angeles or New York in less than a minute. . . .
Pentecost in the Year of the Priest: Spirit of Truth, Wisdom, and Understanding
. . . Up to that point, I had no idea of a blog's potential. They didn't exist when I came to prison nearly sixteen years ago. I read about them, and heard them mentioned on the news, but I had no idea how blogs worked. I remember sitting in my cell last May, knowing that I made a commitment with a deadline, but I had no idea what to write. I thought of my first night in prison, of that maddening, foot stomping chant that went on for hours. So I wrote . . .
A Prisoner, A Professor, A Prelate, Two Priests, and a Poet!
. . . In the corner of my cell where I type sitting on an empty bucket, my head is just six inches from the barred cell window. The window doesn't open - a fact that I deeply resent - but there is a little security grate with a knob that opens a small section of the grate for a little - very little - air. As I sat here early yesterday morning thinking of a title, I heard something unusual through the open grate. It was a song, and it came from a red-breasted robin perched atop the spirals of razor wire on the twenty-foot wall that has been my view of the outside world for sixteen years. I watched the robin for a long time, and listened as he sang. It instantly made me think of . . .
In Honor of Saint Maximilian Kolbe, Patron of Prisoners, Priests, Bloggers
. . . On Saturday, April 10, 2010, our friend, Pornchai Moontri was welcomed into the Church when he received the Sacraments of Baptism and Confirmation. Father Anthony Kuzia, C.M., conferred the Sacraments in the prison Chapel. The Prison Chaplain, Deacon James Daly and I were witnesses. It was both a joyous and solemn event, but something very special occurred during the Sacrament of Confirmation. When Pornchai stated that "Maximilian" was to be his Confirmation name, Father Kuzia shared with us that just before his ordination to priesthood; he visited and prayed in the cell in Auschwitz where Saint Maximilian was martyred. . . .
Catholic Scandal and the News Media: William McGurn Told the Truth!
. . . William McGurn filled in an essential part of the story that Laurie Goodstein conveniently left out of the New York Times. Jeffrey Anderson, a lawyer quoted at length by Ms. Goodstein isn’t just a lawyer "for five men who have brought four lawsuits" against the Church. He is a lawyer who has become ravenously wealthy suing Catholic institutions for decades. He is a lawyer who once boasted to a newspaper that he is "suing the sh-- out of them everywhere." . . . The information that Jeffrey Anderson has made a long career of suing the Catholic Church was well known to Goodstein and The New York Times. As far back as 1988, Mr. Anderson spoke of receiving referrals from other lawyers with clients interested in suing Catholic dioceses and religious orders. He appeared on the "Geraldo [Rivera] Show" on November 14, 1988 to speak of his representation of a man who had been in prison and was then suing a priest for sexual abuse. I wrote of this in . . .
Breaking News: I Got Stoned with the Pope!
. . . Perhaps NBC sensed the line of decency was breached a few weeks ago when it apologized to The Catholic League and the world for a scandalous and libelous smear against Pope Benedict XVI on its affiliate news channel, MSNBC. We owe a debt of gratitude to Bill Donohue and The Catholic League for not letting this one pass. It is also no coincidence that the lurid stories of priestly sex abuse and papal complicity rose to a frenzy in the U.S. in the same weeks that tax-payer funded abortion was being argued in the Obama health care bill. Writer and art historian Elizabeth Lev made this same point in a brilliant essay on PoliticsDaily.com entitled "In Defense of Catholic Clergy (Or Do We Want Another Reign of Terror?)" Ms. Lev cited English statesman, Edmund Burke's 1790 commentary on Catholic witch hunts during the French Revolution: "What would Edmund Burke make of the headlines of the past few weeks …? In 1790, Burke answered ... 'It is not with much credulity I listen to any when they speak evil of those they are going to plunder.' What would he think of the insistent attempt to tie [a] sexual abuser to the Roman pontiff himself through the most tenuous of links … as the present sales of Church property to pay settlements swell the coffers of contingent-fee lawyers and real estate speculators …?" . . .
Fifty-Seven Times Around the Sun
. . . Pornchai started his 19th year in prison just before Easter, and now he is entering a life of faith through the narrowest gate, an open and honest witness to redemptive grace.Pornchai has asked Charlene Duline to be his Godmother. They share an interesting bond that Charlene describes in a new post entitled "Pornchai Moontri is Worth Saving" on the Prodigal Catholic Writer blog. Pierre, the visitor I described in my post, "Stigmatized,” has graciously assented to be Pornchai's Godfather. Because this event is happening in a prison, however, neither one of them will be allowed to be present. I will act as proxy for them both because of the unusual circumstances.I call upon the Church to recognize the transformation that has led Pornchai to Her Sacraments. In "Pornchai's Story," the powerful autobiographical essay The Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights, Pornchai described his transformation: . . .
The Catholic League, Saint Patrick and the Labyrinthine Ways
. . . The part of St. Patrick's story about being carried off by marauders and forced into six years of slavery is seen through the eyes of Irish history as part of the "lucky charm" of St. Patrick's life. Think about that! I doubt very much that it felt that way at age sixteen. He was in the wrong place at the wrong time - or the right place at the right time depending on your point of view.Would Patrick be Saint Patrick without that awful six years of his life? I doubt it. We're in an unholy quagmire if we're hell-bent on shedding where we are in life, or where we've been. God's pursuit of us calls not just our halo, but our shadow as well. We can leave neither behind, and there's no point in running. Just as with "that look" my Irish mother mastered, resistance is futile. . . .
These Stone Walls Mentioned by the Catholic League
Just a quick announcement to let you know that The Catholic League mentioned These Stone Walls in this month's Catalyst. Please follow this link to access:
Descent into Lent
. . . Remember when I wrote last week that I don't swear unless I'm quoting someone? I'm not exactly sure who I was quoting, but out it came! Ninety-nine percent of every day in here is so filled with noise that I can't hear myself think. It was just my luck that my single moment of foul outburst occurred during the sole moment of silence of the entire day in this cavernous place. Over the next hour, I heard a litany of "Fifty cents!" "Fifty cents!" as prisoners came by to gloat. My confessor is planning a visit next week. Good timing! Father Fred is retired in New York City, and drives ten hours round trip every couple of months to touch base with me and hear of my flaws. Fred has been driving up here for over fifteen years. He spends most of his time in retirement writing to priests in prison. I hate losing patience, but it's what I seem to do best. I'm trying hard not to add to the list between now and Fred's visit. The Sacrament of Reconciliation has always been painful and humbling for me, but very necessary. For that reason I have always been sympathetic to how painful and humbling it is for others, and always tried to make it less so. . . .
Going My Way
. . . It’s clear how very much that world view is shaped by the media. Hollywood's treatment of Catholics and the priesthood has sure changed since Bing Crosby donned a Roman collar. One of my friends watched The Bells of St. Mary's, then stopped by my cell to comment. He loved it, but added that today Hollywood would have Father O'Malley on administrative leave for his interest in turning a street gang into a choir. . . . Some of my friends tend to see me as a sort of poster-priest for injustice, ill-treatment, and poor morale in the priesthood. When one friend read Bernadette's comment, she asked point blank what I would do if I knew at ordination what I know today: Would I still become a priest if I knew what was in store for me? Would I still become a priest if I had any sense of the suffering to follow? Would I still become a priest if I had any sense at all? Bear with me. My answers are coming. . . .
Forty Days and Forty Nights
. . . I am not at all spared anxiety in prison, and the place where it most manifests itself is in dreams. I have very vivid dreams since I have been in prison, and they have not abated over the years. I have two recurring dreams that are haunting and clear displays of my own anxiety. They make some nights more… well … Lenten than others. I have had each of them in one form or another many, many times.In one of the dreams, I am about to celebrate Mass in a church. As I begin the Mass, the people in the congregation become hostile. They brandish newspapers and begin to shout as I start the Eucharistic Prayer. Sometimes they are just a crowd of silent, angry, condemning eyes. Sometimes they stand en masse and turn their backs on me. Every version is painful, but I must proceed with the Mass. When the time comes, no one will take the Body of Christ from my hands. . . .